WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?
++ because they are plugged into a genius
WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
++ they don't have enough time
WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?
++ they don't stop to ask directions
WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
++ so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties
WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
++ you need a rough draft before you make a final copy
WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
++ because a vibrator can't mow the lawn
One for the ladies
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweat-shirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma."
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A couple is lying in bed.
The man says,"I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."
The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
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"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbours would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
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Dear Lord,I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN
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Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manual."
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